Chest Pain at Toronto General

4:00PM - At the office. Still experiencing mild chest pains from the night before. These don't seem heart related but I decided to called Telehealth Ontario who had a nurse call me back five minutes later. Ran through a series of standard questions relating to chest pain and advised me to visit emergency at my local hospital even though it didn't sound like a heart event. 4:30PM - Leave office and walk to Toronto General Hospital

5:00PM - Arrive at Toronto General Hospital. Exterior construction keeps me searching for an entrance for five minutes.

5:05PM - Inspect the multi-stage process for seeing someone in emergency. Stage 1 - sign out form at triage station Stage 2 - wait in triage waiting area Stage 3 - consult with triage nurse Stage 4 - wait for registration in triage area Stage 5 - register Stage 6 - wait for doctor

5:15PM - Waiting for registration. Several people here. "Jeffery" is inibriated with a swollen and probably broken left hand which he announces to everyone in waiting is a result of punching a locked door.

5:20PM - "Rodney", inibriated, is brought in by EMT team strapped to stretcher. He is being told to behave.

5:25PM - Women asks EMT why her purse is humming. (Purse is not humming. There is a humming noise in the room from the ventelation system).

5:30PM - See triage nurse.

5:32PM - In response to my "I'm alergic to nuts" answer I'm branded with a red wristband that simply says "NUTS". I'm hoping the staff know this is an allergy and not my assessed mental state.

5:35PM - Register after a brief stage 4.

5:40PM - Jeffery believes Rodney is talking about him and he starts yelling explicatives in Rodney's direction.

5:50PM - Now at stage 6 waiting to be called. Rodney has been moved in and Jeffery leaves hospital obviously perturbed he had to wait so long. Hand is presumeably still broken as he did not see anyone.

6:00PM - Called by triage nurse to go in. Yes!

6:01PM - Arrive inside emergency room area only to be told that triage nurse made a mistake and there are no waiting rooms. No!

6:02PM - Waiting in hallway chair. Hey, Rodney is nearby sleeping it off! 20 something patient, Grant, waiting with his mom next to me.

6:10PM - Waiting. Realizing there appear to be several more stages to this game.

6:10PM - Rodney is awoken by nurse who is clearly not happy with the prospect that she has to clean him up as she announces to her colleagues that he's soaken wet.

6:15PM - Rodney protests but she eventually gets his wet shirt off (yes, I thought something else too) and gets him to put on a hospital gown and blankets.

6:20PM - Rodney continues to sleep it off.

6:25PM - Rodney wanders off to the bathroom.

6:30PM - Rodney returns.

6:35PM - Nurse asks me for a urine sample.

6:36PM - Bathroom was one Rodney used. Not pretty.

6:37PM - Realize that the name on top of the now complete urine sample is not my name. Hopefully it's the doctors?

6:39PM - Confirm that I was confused with Grant 20-somthing next to me. Now know Grant's last name. Sorry for stealing your sample bottle!

6:40PM - Let Christie know via text that I will confirm the nurses know who I am before accepting needles and medication.

5:50PM - Confirm with nurse that they're just busy and have not forgotten me.

7:00PM - Rodney now trying to steal medical supplies and disrupt things by dropping a medical waste bin on the ground. Nurse are oblivious to this and seem to be confused after I tell them.

7:05PM - Receive panicked tech related email from work. "Help to retrieve a deleted file!" Sorry, busy in emergency, please call our IT support firm.

7:10PM - Curious to see if I can read the eye chart bottom line from the required ten feed distance. Check!

7:15PM - Cell battery running low. Boot laptop to juice cell phone from laptop battery. Have to keep Christie informed.

7:20PM - Laptop battery now low from leeching cell phone.

7:30PM - UHN - Wireless Guest Network. Score!

7:31PM - Password required. THIS is how you treat your guests?

7:35PM - Waiting. Writing.

7:45PM - Waiting.

7:50PM - Start working on code. No wireless will make this less productive.

8:05PM - Noticing that even with all the signs, charts and process, nurses still seem to be confused as to who is in what room at what stage for what reason. Not inspiring confidence in the process. It seems like a busy night.

8:07PM - Now past the three hour mark.

8:15PM - Starting to think about the dinner I'm not having.

8:20PM - Laptop battery almost dead. Cell phone battery at 80%.

8:25PM - Nurse asked if I'd seen a doctor yet. Nope. Thinks perhaps my chart was misplaced after a doctor picked it up. Great. Checking to see who's got my chart.

8:30PM - Doctor sees me in the hall and performs brief examination. Examination reveals little. Possibly muscle related based on symptoms related to movement. X-Ray and blood work ordered

9:05PM - Four hours!

9:35PM - Brought to exam room. Confirmed they know who I am.

9:45PM - ECG and blood work.

9:50PM. - Gown for X-Ray.

10:00PM - Waiting at X-Ray. Now five hours.

10:15PM - X-Ray lady returns.

10:20PM - X-Ray lady leaves for the night saying "someone will be with you as soon as possible."

10:30PM - X-Ray dude shows up.

10:35PM - X-Ray taken. Dude apologized for wait. Busy night.

10:45PM - One hour since blood work.

10:50PM - Rodney is awake now. Laughing his ass off. Go back to sleep Rodney.

11:00 - 6 hours! Doctor says 10 minutes to diagnosis.

11:20PM - Diagnosis, muscle pain. Not through an injury, could be stress  Wait a few days.

11:22PM - Discharged! Night Rodney.